Nice shoes faggot you got mousse in your hair lets put mousse in his anus! Id be flipping through MAD magazine and just put the thing down and take it. Manager stumbling out of his glass booth there, the works. on the ground! The composer. Gain full access to show guides, character breakdowns, auditions, monologues and more. The fact is, Ive been acting like a prick. Boos death hit the papers. I thought of him searching through the fridge and not finding a morsel. And the thing was, I blamed her for it. Then, in eighth grade, I started going out with my first boyfriend, Kyle, who was totally gorgeous but he moved to Indiana, and Janis was, like weirdly jealous of him. Oh Hello! James: I thought you were just creative and I thought you were just smarter than me and more sensitive and more interesting. Hello, Dolly! - Quotes.net I look after the house for him, but I go home at one oclock on Wednesday, only Ive got a nice plate of sardines to put my feet up with, because its the royal whats-its called on the telly the royal you know wheres the paper, then? HELLO, DOLLY! "Her husband's death has been recent, she's more in love with his memory. Are you honestly and truly taking Katrina to the dance? I had to stand up to her. Martin, I said. I hid in the shrubs when Mum came outside to see what was happening. She is the lead in a musical which shares the same name as the song. So what if Im young and beautiful? Fine. Hallie: Into the shower. Sign up today to unlock amazing theatre resources and opportunities. Im trying to get something started, and she up and turns on the light and starts to cry and says weve got to talk. Here's a snippet: Hello, Dolly! After I wait for you! The musician. For she hath blessed and attractive eyes. These monologues will work well for auditions, perhaps a showreel update or for just some self-taping fun. Youre sorry?! Jude: Book by MICHAEL STEWART Music and Lyrics by JERRY HERMAN Based on the play THE MATCHMAKER by Thornton Wilder Original Production Directed and Choreographed by Gower Champion Produced for the Broadway Stage by David Merrick and Champion-Five, Inc. TAMS-WITMARK MUSIC LIBRARY, INC. Michael: I worry for a second Im going to make a sex offender out of the poor guy. Thats a pretty over-the-top version. By the time I reached Year Eight I had fifteen pairs of jeans. (to Kayleigh.) What Im sure of is this- we need to stop. She's a widower and meddling matchmaker. So we get keys made for each others apartments. Look, sex and love are separate thingsWell, they can be, thats all Im saying. I want to be better to do good and better things and to make a proper sort of decision here, but I I cant. I know how to open champagne with a sword. By my troth, it is no addition to her wit nor no great argument of her folly, for I will be horribly in love with her. He tells her he cant help himself. But then I was thinkin, well what would I like better have a woman or a man feeling me? (She wears a girlish frock of yellowed voile with a blue silk sash. I highlighted my hair because you said I needed shimmer. I feel like its a lifeline. And if its to do with letting the house then youll have to ring the house-agents, because theyre the agents for the house. Hello Dolly Monologue Flashcards Learn Test Match Flashcards Learn Test Match Created by Gabriella_Hay Terms in this set (7) Its so easy to get wrapped up in the hustle and bustle of our lives or be looking forward to the next something coming up around the corner No waist or hips. Thats all. This isnt working! Theyd be miserable. 1969 Stars: Barbra Streisand, Walter Matthau, Michael Crawford, Marianne McAndrew Genre: Comedy, Musical, Romance Rating: G Runtime: 146 minutes They just don't make musicals like this any more. Now your boyfriend, Ive known since kindergarten. Okay? Its envy, isnt it? And thank heaven, fasting, for a good mans love: I see the tube of diaphragm jelly lying next to the sink. is a musical filled with charisma and with heart. The key to comedy is to play the truth of the situation. Monika: You see, heres the problem. She had five cats. And then theres biting and kissing and touching and suddenly someone starts beating on me, I mean, just pounding on me and growling. Im taking care of it. Beatrix, the 17-year old president of the student body, after her ex-friend deviously cancels the prom. (Just pull the shades first.) Which for some reason I keep calling: vagina. I thought that was the deal. Literally. I highly recommend reading or watching some of the writers work to get the nuance of that writer: a Neil Simon monologue is very different to a Phoebe Waller-Bridge. Okay So, I love you so much, like to the end of the world and back, butsometimes I love you like I feel sorry for a monkey. Tracy: Like, one of my favourites is that the bus breaks down one day in this remote place and there we are stranded together. Of natures sale-work. For instance, okay, junior year I dated this girl, Sue Hornick. Meg bought me this T-shirt at the Warner Brothers store, and its got a picture of Superman on it. Hello Dolly 1969 Film - Casting, Costume Tests, Music - Barbra Archives I know all that. If you marry me, your parents will be ecstatic, and you will have lost a lifelong battle of defiance against them. I might pumice my feet. And bein a good father like encouragin your kids, givin them a tenner if theyre stuck, askin them how they are, always knowin if somethin was up, bein there for them, bein there for them always, always givin your life for them, givin your life to them fuckin hell, thats the kind of person you want to be somebody, more of those kind of people, the kind of person I want to be. I really like you. (beat) No thank-yous no yum-yums not a peep, tho Man is silent as the grave. Cornelius Hackl: We have to, 'cause some rotten cans of chicken mash are going to explode. One year later, she went back for a second interview. And virtuous tis so, I cannot reprove it. Sign up today to unlock amazing theatre resources and opportunities. It won a Grammy and was number one for 9 weeks. And you hate ribbons and you hate pillows and you hate colors you hate everything! A nice manly slap on the back. If Id known Naomi felt like that I wouldve broken it off with her months ago. Theyve showered me with leaflets. I can lie here for hours thinking about him. Maybe if I just vomited on myself the guy would walk the other way but I bet even then, Id get, The way you vomit on yourself is just so, so delightful., All I want is to be left alone. To unlock this lesson you must be a Study.com Member. To have held him in my arms before he went. I just thought you were the most wonderful man that ever lived. Loved her even. But beautiful and my best friend. Stuffed in a box like that, I mean youd be in there for ever. You just take Katrina to the dance okay? I mean, best in ages. I always just assumed I had two. You know, Ive been thinking a lot about why we shouldnt get married. I think you are an amazing woman, I honestly do. There were Aussies killed up there, mate, there were English, there were Scots, there were fucking Moslems, for fucks sake! Amanda Wingfield: PDF Audition Sides: Dolly Quotes." Gene: Listen to Jerry Herman's score, and dance around the living room when a sequined Streisand arrives in a club as Louis Armstrong strikes up the title tune for her benefit. They met in a donut shop. She closed the curtains after that. Youre starting to feel like a woman and believe it or not soon youll understand what its like to be in love. Does that make any sense? On one hand, I want to forget her. Styles havent changed so terribly much after all. 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Cohan: Biography, Music & Songs, Hair the Musical: Synopsis, Songs & Characters, Hard Rock Music: History, Artists & Bands, Hello, Dolly! - Definition, History & Artists, What Is Rap Music? And I dont know about you, but I hate doctors. Warren: Like they just need so much help and theyre in those ugly cages, you know what I mean? Its on the hallway carpet. . Coz all of those things would exponentially cooler than going to the dance with you. I mean, I know its not nice to have a bit of your stomach lining poking out, I get it, I do, but really how much more is there to say? My wife left me. Even so, it was, you know, embarrassin and the mad thing is the room was upstairs with the curtains open and didnt the 19A fly past and the whole top deck nearly broke their necks for a gander. Is he crazy? Full-Length Musical, Comedy / 5f, 4m Book by Michael Stewart Music and Lyrics by Jerry Herman Based on the play The Matchmaker by Thornton Wilder Original Production Directed and Choreographed by Gower Champion Produced for the Broadway Stage by David Merrick and Champion Five, Inc. Love me? I told her boyfriend. I lost 75 pounds! So you see, she knew I was going to lead the Army of the Twelve Monkeys into the pages of history before it ever even occurred to me. Philip: Prom is the quintessential teenage experience. Research Playwrights, Librettists, Composers and Lyricists. Course it was a woman doctor. But I feel it coming up now, more and more, and I just think- No, thats bullshit, actually, the whole work thing. is boisterous and charming from start to finish. Tis not your inky brows, your black silk hair, I mean, there I was just up on the roof with Marissa talking, laughing, having a great time. I know we just met like 3 minutes ago but youre probably looking for someone to get serious with, someone with potential someone who will take you out to eat a few times, see a movie, fool around a little bit, next thing you know were getting a dog and youre moving in. I just cant deal with your negativity while Im trying to grow into a fully-formed human. Im sure you two will have a real great time. Jeffrey: Benedick: Act 2 Scene 3 Both sides As if he were a child And I dont get a Thank You.. You know-plainly, clearly state what they want instead of expecting you to be psychic. On this chip he had laboriously painted my grandmothers face, using ashes mixed with water for ink, and his own hair as a paintbrush. Malaria fever and jonquils and then this boy. But I also definitely said as little as possible and was totally respectful of you in the way I talked about you. She doesnt say a word about it. Hey, Lisa. Now I know this sounds like Im throwing away everything Ive said so far. "We've created a new Dolly Levi, a very young widow," Kelly explained. - Definition, Artists & Instruments, What Is Rumba? Youre in way over your head. And she was beautiful. Copyright 1964 by Jerry Herman: I says. Hello Dolly Monologue Minnie Fay Book file PDF. Megan: I wanted to say something, to tell you hed be looking for his dinner but I couldnt get it out. I had malaria fever all that spring. Now if you dont mind, I have some unfinished business to attend to. The CSAS alum casts her spell over Broadway musical's tour And as can be ascertained from the lyrics she is a very excitable figure, the life of the party so to speak. Cos hes chatting up some girl or something. Foul is most foul, being foul to be a scoffer. Minnie Fay: A banana a day keeps the doctor away. To this day I dont know why he chose me but he did. Its like hes confused about how attractive I am he cant quite believe it. So, O.K., like the Haitians need to come to America but some people are all, What about the sprain on our resources? And its like, when I had this garden party for my fathers birthday and its all catered, you know, I said R.S.V.P. because its a sit down dinner. Her love interest is Horace Vandergelder, who owns a feed store and is a half-a-millionaire. No, maybe I do know. This Book have some digitalformats such us : kindle, epub, ebook, paperbook, and another formats. Hello there, how are you? 2 Audition Sides: Dolly DOLLY Ephraim, let me go! 11 chapters | 2 Hello Dolly Monologue Minnie Fay 2020-07-26 Twelve Years a Slave Dramatists Play Service Inc This book considers developments in the production and consumption of popular music in England over a period of some two hundred years, which saw dramatic changes in the socio-economic, demographic and cultural life of the country. I opened the caf with my friend Boo. Dolly Levi: Mr. Kemper, everything concerns Dolly Levi! Web. Stop! when guys come up to me, with their cheesy lines, (imitating guy) Hey, you have such a beautiful smile or Can I just tell you that you are so beautiful. Horace: All the facts about you are insults! Even though I was pretty excited about what happened last night, and also about like, maybe like, the prospect of like, I dont know, like going out with you Which I would be very into, if you were. They used to try to blow me up. No more drinking, no more getting worked up, no more smoking, apparently Im ignoring that, obviously but. Guys are blind, they really are, OBLIVIOUS to when a girl is not interested. Well Im sorry, Ive loved a few people a lot, but no-ones ever stepped out of the shadows and handed me a crystal ball. (beat) Some very bad guys strapped a bomb to my chest and they are forcing me to commit a crime. My friend Fitzy can get me floor seats. But I say that I cant bear to be just another notch on his belt. Jerry Hermans energetic Hello, Dolly! Its a wonderful age. Girls were going to be in their bathing suits. Picture this: Ive been through all the sitting, the waiting, spent three pounds thirty-nine on a mediocre sandwich, been wired up to a monitor, jogged, et cetera, Ive been jiggled about, prodded, pressed with some very chilly instruments, got released, finally, back into the world, with my clogged-up arteries and uncertain future, Im in the lift going down, who should I bump into? Who might be your mother, A return from Miss Mortimer again? Christ almighty, try working for you for a living! And its not like me. PUT EM DOWN! Holy shit, theres stock boys bunch of guys I know, even are running down the isle. No vases to hold them? I try to imagine how hed notice me and fall hopelessly in love with me and all that. You know? But they wrote the most incredible, passionate letters every day, and they really made those two hours count. HELLO, DOLLY! Having a really great comedy piece will make you stand out and allow you to show off your range as an actor. He did it from memory, but it was a perfect likeness of her. And I can be proud of who I am. Mother said, Honey, theres no more room for jonquils. And still I kept on bringing in more jonquils. Im going to admit something I never thought Id admit to anyone ever. Max: Sell when you can; you are not for all markets. Comedy Monologues | StageMilk Matchmaker Dolly Levi is a widow, a matchmaker, and also a professional meddler --but everything changes when she decides that the next match she needs to make is to find someone for herself. Quotes.net. Just how big a target do they need, you figure? It had to be! I have a man, I love my man and I do my best to be polite but the irritation and the cheesy lines are getting to be too much. Terrify me. So I start tellin her about my mole and cancer and all this and she starts feelin me like she had plastic gloves on and I was lyin on this bed, like a baby almost . Youre a very attractive girl. You know the problem with pyromania? Well maybe. He drove a black Suzuki Vitara had five earrings and the word Fuck tattooed inside his lip. Hunted. Dolly Levi: Mr. Kemper, do you mind if we go inside? As Dolly sets her mission into motion over the course of one momentous day, love, hope and optimism blooms among those fortunate to be in her meddlesome path. Its the only crime where you have to be at the scene of it to make it a perfect crime, to give yourself satisfaction. Im gonna give you the short version of an incredibly complicated and f up situation, so please be cool. A pretty girl at a party once asked me if I secretly liked that Harry had a paunch, because it made him less attractive to other women. I think you have to marry me. It's the things that come gift wrapped that count! She accidentally killed herself. - Definition, History & Artists, What Is the Tango? Come and join the fun in our online acting class, Copyright 2023 StageMilk | an ARH Media PTY LTD website. Jesus, thats disgusting, whats wrong with you? Horace: It takes a woman all powdered and pink to joyously clean out the drain in the sink! won Academy Awards for best sound, art direction, and musical score. A cold hard fact. LEVI (Continued) AND A GIRL OVER SIX FOOT THREE LOVES A MAN WHO COME UP TO HER EAR, SURELY, IT'S OBVIOUS SHE'LL NEVER BE SEDUCED TIL SOME KIND SOUL CONDESCENDS TO GIVE HER BEAU A LITTLE BOOST! There is no box. met your father ! Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. The role Horace Vandergelder was a lot of fun to. And God knows we tried. This monologue is from Thornton Wilder's "The Matchmaker". WHO CARES WHAT PSYCHIATRISTS WRITE ON WALLS? And who can hold their own in an interesting discussion. Okay. Ive been trying to rationalize them away, pressure from the wedding, the intimacy of working together, but I cant. I wanna thank all of you for a terrific summer. We'll start with Lesson 7, the Waltz Kick Turn. was an important and frequently covered piece. O, I am out of breath in this fond chase! Happier? Learn more and register your interest at our online acting course page. Now I have to get going do my part. Let the record show that I, Olive Penderghast, being of sound mind, ample-ish breast size and an occasional corny knock-knock joke do enter this video blog in the case against me. He would hate me for telling you but hed lost control of his bowels. I definitely caved in to the peer pressure. Brandon: Or wasted? They say the lady is fair tis a truth, I can bear them witness. is that, beyond the title song, there aren't any other truly standout songs. I know hed never go for a dag like me. Getting some tests done. And for a split second Im thinking YES! I tell her I loved Hope Floats. My grandparents. Why were you talking to Janis Ian? All right. He was a political prisoner in Argentina. That was the spring I had the craze for jonquils. But for any guy hoping that the sizzling details of my sordid past will inspire you to lock the bathroom door and do it to it with your sisters moisturising lotion youll be gravely disappointed. So then you know what happens? But it is my right, and the right of every plain, frumpy, book-wormy, soon-to-be librarian to have one night of Cinderella magic. . Ken: And then I almost threw up, because that lady who smells of egg went by, and also because what if, what if wed stayed together, what if hed asked me, and Id said yes in a moment of madness and let him do his thing, and wed done the normal stuff, and had the babies, would that be my life now? Some of us, however, love big, splashy, overdone musical scenes, of which the. (defensive) There were circumstances. But heres the thing, I tried college for a year. Minnie Fay's Monologue // Hello Dolly - YouTube 0:00 / 1:25 Minnie Fay's Monologue // Hello Dolly 3,917 views Jul 24, 2019 18 Dislike Share Haley Katherine 7 subscribers Haley Katherine. It disgusts me. This can be no trick. Even if we have to go with our cousin, or our gay best friend from tap class, we will have a Prom. A man loves the meat in his youth that he cannot endure in his age. Have I told you how Martin died? And she cant help herself. (as if this is shocking) I was best friends with her in middle school. I thought we had a really good time together and I was actually in a fairly Up state of mind for once. Is there oh any other time you might have told me this! "Hello, Dolly! Ugh! I just fuckin killed Chuck. I put it to you, Camp Firewood, as we spend the last dinner together: Be proud of who you are. One of the peculiar things about Hello, Dolly! New York, NY, Accessibility Statement Terms Privacy |StageAgent 2020. Here are five reasons why you should see this feel-good showcase, breezily directed with audience-friendly engagement by Brian Sharp and featuring fabulous turn-of-the-century costumes by . Bacon and eggs and buttered toast. The moment their eyes met, they fell in love. Join StageAgent today and unlock amazing theatre resources and opportunities. Like foggy south puffing with wind and rain? Monologue from Hello, Dolly!-Cornelius Hackl - YouTube And thats it. Shakespeare in the Woods 2023 Season You hate everything. Always the same, isnt it. " from Fourteen " Tommy Has Proposed " from An Ideal Husband (Mabel) " You Won't Misunderstand Me " from The Goal (Sir Stephen) " You're Quite a Girl " from 42nd Street (Julian) " You've Got to Come Back a Star " from 42nd Street (Julian) Lon: Uncontrollable passion, etcetera. So, hey, Lise you wanna go see Judas Priest at Nassau Coliseum? Upgraded. How to pick a comedy monologue: And I know you have feelings for me, too. Study Guide-- Thetare Under The Stars I loved this monologue and I loved me character, but I'm not a huge fan of the musical. All lacy with dogwood, literally flooded with jonquils! I spent my money on magazines and electronics fashion mostly. I went in and there was Martin sitting bolt upright in his chair with his nostrils quivering and the most terrible look on his face. Hello Dolly Monologue Minnie Fay (2022) - www.thyroidccc Hello, Dolly! (Musical) Plot & Characters | StageAgent Because if you do, your parents will always know the unhappiness you feel for not being able to disappoint them. Gonna really make an effort. Hello, Dolly! Do, as a monster fly my presence thus. I empty the tube of jelly into the toilet, take my tube of muscle liniment, hold the two tubes nozzle to nozzle, and fill up the jelly tube with Tiger Balm. This is the real deal, honey and nothing you do is going to come between as. Are you really gay? Do you think I let that stop me? HELLO DOLLY AUDITION SIDES | northernlightoperaco Audition Songs for Hello, Dolly! - By Character | Theatre Trip You probably think Im some spoiled brat whos never had it hard cause I didnt have to walk a mile to school. You want to come inside, have some chicken fingers awesome. If you have been asked to prepare a comedy monologue, dont think that it has to be the funniest two minutes of your life. Its What you may not know is that I also own a bottle of dick cream, I fondle my sweaters, and I often like to smear mud on my ass. Anyone but herself, that is. If you really loved me you wouldnt need to ask. That they wont be bettered. Not literally. Its so embarrassing, I dont even whatever. Hello Dolly- Monologue 1 Flashcards | Quizlet Next we have the cast of characters that are the objects of Dolly's matchmaking: Cornelius Hackl, Barnaby Tucker, Irene Molloy, Minnie Fay, Ambrose Kemper, Ermengarde, and Ernestina Money. Quotes.net. Oh Mrs. Molloy, what shall we do? It's been long enough, Ephraim! AND THEN OF COURSE I STARTED GOING FUCKING STIR-FUCKING-CRAZY THINKING OF ALL THE THINGS I COULD HAVE SAID. So that made it easier. Yknow, about authentic love. But thats not the worst bit, Stephen. Tom: Possess your soul in patience you will see! I mean, hes just laying out there. SO, I PUT MY HAND IN THERE. To catch a beau I suppose. People used to throw firecrackers on my head in high school. is a musical filled with charisma and with heart. Boom. New York, NY, Escape To Margaritaville And Lost my Anonymity Along the Way. Hello Dolly- Monologue 1 Term 1 / 11 1st line Click the card to flip Definition 1 / 11 Oh dear, oh my, will you look at that, ten o'clock and the shop's not opened yet Click the card to flip Flashcards Learn Test Match Created by Terms in this set (11) 1st line Oh dear, oh my, will you look at that, ten o'clock and the shop's not opened yet First performed on Broadway in 1964, it enjoyed a nearly 3000 show first run, was awarded 10 Tonys, and has seen numerous revivals both on and off Broadway. Can I be a dad or not? He stared at her for a whole hour. Just thinking he might look at me, my heart starts pounding like mad. (Feverishly) This is the dress in which I led the cotillion, won the cakewalk twice at Sunset Hill, wore one spring to the Governors ball in Jackson ! The one dark secret that will absolutely be the wedge that keeps us apart. Judy Rude. Like, totally. Dolly Levi: And on those cold winter nights, Horace, you can snuggle up to your cash register. Youre jokin? I says. But doth not the appetite alter? Father I wanted to be. So sad that he had to die in such shame. Jerry Herman's energetic Hello, Dolly! Im with you now, but Im thinking about him, and thats not fair to either of us. She told me she just wanted a bit of fun, and now she turns around and does this! Then, using the computer model, they generated every thought I could possibly have in the next, say ten years, which they then filtered through a probability matrix to determine everything I was going to do in that period. I have, we have feelings for each other. Its weird to say this, because in many ways Im already in so deep. PDF ACT ONE Scene 1 2$ /1/ OPENING ACT ONE - The Soul Rhythm . Yes, but theres no one here, love. He tells me that Ive got an unresolved problem with my mother. Glittering stage numbers showcase a commanding Barbra Streisand as Dolly Levy, a New York matchmaker who can find a mate for anyone. I confess Im, in no small part, to blame for all the gossip that has turned my varsity letter scarlet. Gorgeous, fresh-faced, heels, wearing a skirt, new top, little bit sexy, on my way to save my caf and yes, I am strutting. There was fucking everybody: everyones hopes were up there in those two towers.Its a war, Talbot It is a war. Martin couldnt stand unidentified smells. Carter: If you really want to know, married life sucks. I mean, who the hell does this guy or that guy think he is to give me such compliments? They say too that she will rather die than give any sign of affection. But I cant help it. I pulled myself up, I studied hard, I read every book in the library and now I work for the government and have the highest possible security clearance. You just take Katrina to the dance because I can think of so many cooler things to do that night. Do you see where Im going with this? How about Duke Ellington, Ella Fitzgerald, Judy Garland, Liza Minelli, Marvin Gaye, Benny Goodman, and Frank Sinatra, among others.